


In My Dreams

by Skyline (skybs)



Series: Papermoon [3]
Category: The Sentinel
Genre: M/M, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 1998-05-16
Updated: 1998-05-16
Packaged: 2017-10-24 16:24:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/265509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skybs/pseuds/Skyline
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Okay, here's the sequel to 'Home To You' and before you start yelling at me there will be at least two more stories!<br/>Thanks to Liriel, Strange Music and Bine for being such wonderful friends.<br/>Thanks to Regina for the beta!</p>
    </blockquote>





	In My Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, here's the sequel to 'Home To You' and before you start yelling at me there will be at least two more stories!  
> Thanks to Liriel, Strange Music and Bine for being such wonderful friends.  
> Thanks to Regina for the beta!

_And still, my dreams are the same:  
You stand beside me again,  
you take my hand and we walk together.  
Tonight I will whisper your name  
in my dreams again and again.  
\-- 'In My Dreams' by Papermoon_

Blair lay on the couch in his apartment, clutching a pillow tightly to his chest. He wiped away the tears that filled his eyes with the back of one hand.

He still could feel a soft tingle on his lips, a reminder of the kiss earlier that day.

Dinner with Jim had begun innocently enough. They had talked about the time spent apart - Jim had finally made Captain and Blair couldn't stop telling the best stories about his time in China. What the younger man didn't mention was the fact that for most of the time he had missed his ex-lover, the longing for an intimate touch as pervasive as the dreams he had had every night since he had left Cascade. He had known that it wouldn't be easy to leave everything behind but he hadn't been prepared for the memories that would hit him with full force.

First he had denied the feeling of incompleteness - had shoved the memories away, pretending that his decision to leave had been right. After a while, when the dreams wouldn't stop and the memories hadn't faded, he hadn't been so sure anymore. During this period, he had spent most of the time drowning in self-pity, wishing and pleading to every deity he knew, and to some he didn't, to bring Jim back, to make everything a long nightmare. It hadn't happened.

It took him a long time to realize that he had had to leave back then because this had been his only chance to come to the conclusion that Jim Ellison was his life after all - that he needed him like air to breathe. He had taken Jim for granted - he failed to realize how much he depended on the older man and had wished that he were free.

Then he had been free and it hadn't been what he thought it would be. The words of Brother Marcus had echoed in his mind, "You know only then what you had when you lose it." This had been the first time he fully realized what it meant.

Nevertheless, when he got back, almost a year ago, he hadn't had the courage to let Jim know that he was back. It wasn't that he didn't want to. It was just that the fear that the Sentinel wouldn't want him back in his life was too strong. And then, out of the blue, Jim Ellison had stood in front of him in the middle of a grocery store.

And today they had met in a restaurant for dinner. Casual talking had dominated, not one word about their former relationship.

Then Jim had kissed him or he had kissed Jim, he didn't know which. But he did know that for a brief moment it felt like they hadn't been apart, all the once-well-known trust and love surrounding them like a blanket, keeping them warm, was there again. Then reality struck and the moment was gone.

Blair sighed, tears running freely down his cheeks. He just hoped that Jim would understand the note he had hidden in Jim's jacket. Understand it for what it was - a question, an offer for a future together.

 

\---

Blair sat on the edge of a cliff, wind blowing through his hair. It was quiet and he felt at peace. Above him he could see an eagle gliding through the air obviously searching for something. After a while, minutes or hours - he couldn't tell, the eagle seemed to have found it. He watched with amazement as the proud animal gracefully landed just in front of a big, black panther.

The two of them eyed each other, their eyes seemed to glow. And then the eagle launched itself from the ground, guarding the cat from above.

Blair smiled and drifted deeper into sleep.

 

\---

//I know that livin' with you, baby, was sometimes hard but I'm willing to give it another try.//

The words of Sinead O'Connor's song whispered in his dream - and he smiled knowing that he would give it another try - a second chance to fulfill their destiny.

Sentinel and Guide. Panther and Eagle.

End.


End file.
